So very hot...

It’s been hot here. So very hot. I survived the past six summers without conditioned air, but wow, you definitely need it here. It’s not the daytime temps that force my hand, either, though it’s regularly hit triple-digits the past two weeks; it’s that it never gets cool enough at night to open windows and cool off. The other night it was still 92 degrees at midnight! I’m kind of petrified to see my electricity bill for this month.

Oh yeah, and another thing: my electric company has been adding $7 surcharges on my last few bills because I haven’t been using enough electricity! Only in Texas. If this month, even after my copious air conditioning use, I still don’t meet their threshold, I’m going to call up and ask for tips on how to use more electricity. Running an empty dryer? 24-hour TV viewing? All-halogen light fixtures?

I’ll say one thing about this state: great bumper stickers on pickups. Some of my favorites: “Keep Houston Ugly”; “Keep Honking, I’m Reloading” paired with an NRA logo; and “Don’t Tread on Me” paired with “Right-Wing Extremist.”

Since I’m taking a scatter-shot approach to posting today, I want to highlight how crappy the public transportation is here. The “DART” is not only the only bus and rail system I’ve been on that posts, in addition to “no eating” and “no loud music,” signs stating “no gambling or games of chance.” Sadly, these signs have failed to dissuade DART patrons from playing both dice and dominos for cash on recent trips (though, sadly, no three-card-monte).

DART officials are constantly whining in the news about declining revenue, yet after dozens of trips I’ve yet to see anyone checking tickets on the light-rail. Instead, they seem content to refill their coffers by ticketing anyone and everyone who jaywalks across the downtown tracks, even with no trains visible for six blocks either way.

I once made the mistake of crossing against the red, and halfway across noticed two DART workers on the other side of the street pointing at me and beginning to reach for their ticket pad. Thinking quickly, I craned my neck, put on my best “where is that gosh-darn train I’m waiting for” face, and, shaking my head, turned and walked back to the sidewalk. It was Oscar-worthy, and saved me $80.

At least there are two more light-rail lines in the works by 2010, barring an all-too-possible financial collapse. It would be awesome to get to the parking-scarce Deep Ellum and Fair Park areas by train. Still, these new lines won’t solve the problem of not being able to get from the world’s sixth-busiest airport to downtown Dallas in under ninety minutes (shuttle-to-shuttle-to-train-to-light-rail. Stupid Irving NIMBYs.).